When I think back a few years o my life I realize that I haven't achieved what I wanted. Somehow that's fine, but I still can't help to wonder what would have happened if some of my decisions were different, if I didn't go one way, but the other?
The past is in th past and that's where it should be, I am thinking about now and about the future. I can change my future but there are gonna be people in my way, as usual, and I'm fine by that. I have realized that somewhere, somehow, someone will be jealous and I will not think about that, just turn the other cheek and smile at them and say "I am who I am and if you don't like it then thats not my problem"
When and if my dream comes true I will not be sorry or all that I'm leaving behind, leaving a country, "a world" that's disappointed me, changed me into someone bad, made me feel worse then I have ever felt in my whole life.
Of course I will miss my family, but the people that call them selfs my "friends" those I will not miss. According to me a person that calls them self as my friend they are supposed to be there for you when I feel bad, sad, happy, or any other feeling a person might feel. The people around me are not someone I would call my friend, family is a whole different thing, I know they will be there for me no matter what it is that I need help with.
I am borne in Bosnia, a pretty good country where I sometimes go on vacation but that is not a country that I would move to and live there for the rest of my life. That country does not feel like my home. Now I live in Sweden and Sweden doesn't either feel like my home.
For all my life I have seeking for the place where my mind, soul and heart are but I have never found it.
In a strange way I have always feel drawn to the big U.S. I can't explain it but somehow it feels like I belong there.
Some might think that it's the stupidest thing you have ever heard but everybody has their dream and mine is to move to America.
Think what you want, say what you want but somehow, sometime I will make my biggest dream come true. I will live and work in America. I will have MY American Dream.
Am not THAT huge fan of Madonna but there are two songs that I can REALLY listen to. I suggest you listen to them.
Madonna - American Pie
Madonna - Miles Away.
These songs make me think of the life in America.
